The Volderic Priests of the Order of Phrixus built the crystalline Church of the Fortunate Apocalypse per the writings of the founder of their order. Phrixus had written that one day something would come crashing down from the sky and land, burning, in the Church. And sure enough, that happened. Three spaceships fell from the sky to the planet Zebulon, crashing through its crystalline spires and lighting the entire structure on fire.

Not long after, the Church was purchased by Colonel Harland Sanders the Senior, and converted into a foo

Regent Severus of the Lysithian Republic had attempted to undermine the rule of King Elvis of Zebulon. In addition to political maneuvering, he attacked the King directly by landing his command ship on Tshor Li Island near the Museum of Antiquities. his Szorbian shock troops then attacked the museum. Inside the museum, Winnie the Punk and his comrades were working with Phrixus to rid Elvis of the Spawn of Cthulhu, who had taken over his body. Phrixus proteced the museum with an energy shield until a counterattack could be organized.

Through an unholy joining, which is best left undescribed, the Scarlet Lion and the Great Old One Cthulhu produced offspring. The egg was deposited on the moon to mature, but was stolen by Winnie the Punk and brought to Zebulon. The egg hatched after a crash landing at the Church of the Fortunate Apocalpse on Zebulon and immediately invaded the body of King Elvis. Phrixus and the order of Volderic priests who serve him were able to separate the godling from Elvis and set it free. Elvis was restored and resumed the throne of Zebulon.

Volderic Deity of Winds and Prophecy

The Chronogismo can now be set to RC9.5.2, and I've started adding content from the most recent RileyCon. PCs and the Episode Summary are complete; soon, NPCs, Locations, etc., will be posted.

I'm also working on setting up file attachments so that the modules and character sheets will appear beneath each episode summary.

Winnie the Punk, Porkboy, Elvis, the Colonel, the Tick, a space monkey, and a few Vegan mercenaries crash on Zebulon. The planet is under martial law, and the King has been overthrown. To complicate matters, the rightful king, Elvis, has just been invaded by the Spawn of Cthulhu who wants nothing more than to such the life force from all creation. The only hope: the Scrolls of Phrixus. Uniting with priests from the Order of Phrixus, they set out to ignite the beacons of Phrixus, allowing them to meet the ancient Zebuloid Prophet at the Museum of Ancient History on Tschor Li Island. When they met Phrixus, they were suprised to learn that he is the older brother of the Scarlet Lion. He agreed to work to banish the young Cthulhoid, but his work required peace and quiet. To complicate the issue, the Cthulhoid energy was drawing interdimensional time/space vortices into the area, and these had to be closed. At the same time, rebel troops opposed to King Elvis surrounded the museum. Phrixus was able to work, however, because the interdimensional portals were closed, and the museum's shield system was enabled. The shields collapsed, however, under bombardment by a Lysithian assault ship under the command of Regent Severus. Severus was intent on killing Phrixus, but his plans went awry as Winnie the Punk and King Elvis rallied the Zebuloid troops. The Volderic Church also came to the aid of the King, turning the tide of battle. Severus's ship was downed, but Severus himself teleported to safety. Finally, Phrixus isolated the Cthulhoid which granted Porkboy one final wish -- a handsome retirement package.

The details

Chased by space mercenaries and the lunar spaceship Valkyrie, Winnie the Punk, Porkboy and Elvis were headed to Zebulon, ready to sell the Spawn of Cthulhu and retire. The Tick's inability to ignore shiny red buttons, however, resulted in all three ships crashing meteor-like into the Church of the Fortunate Apocalypse, in fulfilment of the Prophecies of Phrixus. The impact cracked the Spawn's egg case, and there was little anyone could do before the Spawn crawled into an unconscious Elvis's mouth and took over his body. Immediately, the Spawn fed, draining the life force of everyone in the room. From here, there was but one logical course of action: to heed the Scroll of Phrixus.

The Scrolls spoke of five beacons and a cat. Since everyone was now in the same boat, drained and threatened by the naive but powerful Cthulhoid, they banded together to ignite the beacons. Each beacon was a cunningly clever puzzle, or at least cunning enough. After igniting the beacons, they placed the Bejeweled Cat of Zebulon in the Museum of Antiquities on Tshor Li Island.

Phrixus, it turned out, was inside the Cat all along, living comfortably in a castle of his own design. He warned the others that the beacons and the presence of immense otherworldly energies would attract attention from other planes. Phrixus also said that he could attempt to separate Elvis from the Cthulhoid, but would need some peace and quiet.

As Phrixus worked, the others were returned to the Museum. Portals from other dimensions began opening, and each had to be shut down to prevent Armies of Evil^tm from coming through. Meanwhile, the museum itself was surrounded by Zebuloid troops intent on bringing down King Elvis. To hold them back, the Priests of the Order of Phrixus ran around the museum, bringing up its defense fields.

As the shields went up, and the last portal was closed, the museum was rocked by energy blasts from a Lysithian assault ship. Elite Szorbian ground troops joined the battle around the museum, leading the anti-royalist Zebuloid forces.

Phrixus separated the Cthulhoid from Elvis, and Elvis was able to rally some of the troops to his side. Winnie the Punk took control of the Loyalist forces and directed the battle, while others took on the Szorbs.
Finally, the tide of the battle turned, and huge rocks were lobbed at the Lysithian ship. Regent Severus of Lysithia raged against Phrixus before transmatting out of the abandoned ship.

Level 2 - Good Cleric

George’s call came at an opportune time: the police had raided your party at the university and arrested everyone there for violating curfew. Under martial law, they were technically right, but what a way to spoil the evening. So far, the new government has been cautious in its dealings with the Volderic Church. People may make fun of George Flamestrike and his band of religious nuts, the Secret Order of Phrixus, but few are willing to openly tangle with the priesthood.

You are a priest of Blophus, the Volderic Deity of Food and Wine.

Level 2 - Good Cleric

Uh oh, look who failed her plastic surgery saving throw… the effect is chilling.

Level 2 - Neutral Cleric

Oh my. Well, you’ve always had one foot in the grave anyhow, as it were…

Level 2 - Good Cleric

You *would* be worried, if you thought any of this were even remotely real.